Friday, April 1, 2011

Our Sky April Horoscopes

As seen in The Triangle

Aries: The last time we had such an explosive Uranian spring was April 1932 when the roiling masses were cooking over a lower flame in a stew that had been fermenting for 80 years, and was thick as cooked marrow. What we see boiling now are the slender stalks of human rights sown in the revolutions of the 1960’s. At this high temp the current sweet concoction will quickly evaporate and what’s left will reach first the soft ball, then the hard ball stage.

Taurus: You know how Jesus started out on the donkey with crowds welcoming him and next thing he knew he was hauled off for crimes against the state by Roman soldiers? That’s about what happens to you after the 21st; you’ll find yourself in the middle of the vortex. Thanks to the dedicated members of groups like the American Civil Liberties Union, you can expect a better outcome.

Gemini: If this were Thanksgiving you would be carving the turkey. Instead you’ll just have to whittle something out of a bar of soap or a handy piece of wood. Don’t forget the stone for keeping your blade clean.

Cancer: This pressure, unbearable though it is, cannot last but so much longer. That’s the attitude you have to take at this stage of the game when there is so much to lose. But this might just be the beginning and you may be amazed at how much more you can sustain. You are about to discover just how tough you really are.

Leo: You have to be moving to change gears, and the less resistance the better. You may as well trust your intuition because it’s about all you can hear right now.

Virgo: A woman recognized by the Obama administration for visionary business practices made a remark about how open information was like ideas having sex. You may be insuring the fidelity of a project by asking for a down payment as proof of commitment.

Libra: A memorable event is not one that turns out just as you had hoped, but instead is made unforgettable by some completely unexpected factor. The need to adjust to a shocking reality grabs our attention and holds it.

Scorpio: Most of this is dress rehearsal for you, like final exams, or defending your thesis. Get in there and practice what you preach. Worry about the judges’ response later.

Sagittarius: This makes me think of those college parties thrown by the groups with Greek letters for their names. What is that all about anyway? Why not Hebrew or Arabic? I wonder if there would still be a keg and students listing in front yards like sailors.

Capricorn: These are the kinds of times that make you feel really needed. Nothing pulls your emotional strings like a serious crisis, and we are obviously in the middle of a big one. Keep in mind this need will last several years and require a sustained effort. Think of yourself as entering a tunnel; your freedom will be greatly restricted but you’ll have plenty of direction.

Aquarius: If we flip this cycle back to 1932 when groups were goose stepping, we see your traditional planet in power. This time around there is far less control but a refreshing air of civility and friendship. The crowds may not be falling in line behind you, but they are watching. Sometimes, like when you’re raising a flag under fire, philosophical advice is just static in the air.

Pisces: On the 5th your idealistic planet returns to power briefly for the 1st time since the surrender of Fort Sumter in 1861. This is a welcome homecoming for a planet that has been stuck since the end of WWII in the same early stage of a 500 year cycle w/Pluto. The profusion of information without a coherent structure will continue to chug three steps forward and one back, without approaching a more objective perspective, for at least 20 more years. The current power resides in the renewed spiritual theme. A sociological approach to religion will help you get back on track after spiritual squalls.

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